Tag Archives: funeral book

Grave Expectations planning the end like there is no tomorrow- a yourfuneralguy book review

27 Apr

The title of the book, “Grave Expectations Planning the End like there is no Tomorrow”is clever, and the graphics are done well,  That is where the value of this “funeral” book begins and ends.

There is too much writing required in this book, for the person who wants to plan their funeral.There are many cute facts about funerals written on the white background in the margin of this book.They are simply interesting things about funerals that have nothing to do with planning one’s funeral.

This work has several pages that warn you about Funeral Directors, but gives no concrete advice on how to deal with the sales professionals you will negotiate your funeral contract with. There is no real advice beyond:

“Don’t let anyone push you around or embarrass you. Go to the internet and check out all the options you have choose from”(page 53).

This is poor advice as the places to plan your funeral online are too numerous to count.Some are very good and others not so good. A little guidance on this would have been helpful.

There ARE NO WORDS in the book on how to deal with funeral pre need or prepaying for a funeral, which is how many folks deal with a funeral in North America. Many folks have been taken and lost money in preneed funeral schemes. Not to mention the Prepaid Funeral and the pitfalls involved makes this work inadequate.

In Chapter 10 the idea of A Funeral Rehearsal dinner that one attends before one’s death is a very creative idea, and thoughtful. But in many death circumstances(sudden death,long hospitalization) it is not at all possible.

The book offers some falsehoods when looking for an urn on line. On Page 96 the authors state that the International Cemetery and Funeral Association(ICCFA) and the National Funeral Directors Association(NFDA) police online establishments that sell funeral goods and services..(Page 96)

The sad truth is that these organizations simply are not setup to do this. They do not even police their own members, and could not even if they wanted to. The fact that the authors allowed that to be printed indicates a lack of understanding about funerals and the funeral industry.

There is much more that can be said about this book. It is incomplete and too tedious(too much writing) exercise in planning your funeral.

The authors and Cider Mill Press, the publisher did not do their homework om Funerals.

Funeral Industry|Funeral News|Funeral Blog by Your Funeral Guy

Funeral Industry Site says Funeral Scandal Up in 2009-YourFuneralGuy

6 Jan

Funeral Scandal will continue an grow in 2010

ConnectingDirectors.com agrees with me that 2009  was the year  of the Funeral Scandal. However in the forums the webmaster insisted That Scandal Is caused by a few bad apples who disgrace the Funeral Industry.  This is funeral industry myth about Funeral Scandal. Service Corporation International itself  Leader The Funeral Industry Scandal itself amounts to more than  a few bad apples.

ConnectingDirectors.Com and many industry Old timers insist that the media(press) sensationalize scandal because their business is death. The exact opposite is true the press and the media are not inclined to report Scandal because they rely on the paid obituary from the the Funeral Director for money. In Connecting Directors case and the Newspapers it is also paid advertising  from the  funeral home and the industry that fuels lack of honesty.

This is all covered in Your Funeral Guys  Funeral book “Rest in Peace.”  Naively hoping there will be less funeral scandal in 2010 than 2009 is unrealistic

“SCI, Walmart, and Batesville Lead List of Top 10 Funeral Industry Stories of 2009

2009 wasn’t exactly a picture perfect year for the funeral industry. Marred by scandal after scandal, most press that was given to the industry was negative. Lets hope the 2010 can be a better year.” via ConnectingDirectors.Com

For economic reasons alone, Funeral Scandal will increase in 2010.

Funeral Industry| Funeral  News| Funeral Blog

Your Funeral Guy Booted for Pro Family Lower Cost Funeral Comments.

1 Jan

Your Funeral Guy has been booted by Connecting Directors, an attempt to throw him under the funeral industry bus. 🙂

Your Funeral Guy has been booted from a  major Funeral Industry Website for comments promoting the Pro family low cost funeral options. My agenda is the presentation of the low cost funeral alternatives. For many Funeral Homes this works well.On the whole the funeral industry is vehemently opposed to presenting  the lower cost funeral  in the arrangement conference.

Keep In Mind that The WEBMASTER WHO KNOWS WHAT’s Good for Funeral Service has never worked in a Funeral Home!

Disabled Account

Dear Brian,

I have decided that your commentary on my website is not for the betterment of funeral service or for my members. Although debate is healthy, I feel you are using my site to further your personal agenda.

I have disabled your account and any new accounts created as an alais will be disabled as well.


Ryan Thogmartin, CEO
Connecting Directors
P.O. Box 430
4300 West Pike
Zanesville, Ohio

Your funeral guy was with ConnectingDirectors.com for 2 years referring professionals to the site..But no more.  At one point  early on I donated copies of the Low cost funeral book “REST IN PEACE to the  First Connecting Directors store for sale to help this site..


Shay Wheat -YourFuneralGuy is a very kind soul, he is very professional and always willing
to help others, especially in a time of need.-Naymz

Statement From Your Funeral Guy:

Your Funeral Guy debates fair and honestly on the web. My agenda has always been THE LOW COST Funeral options for families and the consumer. I have never set up an account with aliases. Who I am and what I represent is clear to all.

Unlike Connecting Directors.com I am not beholding to funeral industry Corporation Advertisers. I can speak freely.

My internet and personal agenda are always clear. I have  not  actively promoted  funeral homes ( but have mentioned a low cost funeral home example once)or businesses  at my sites only the lower cost funeral. There are no advertisers, nothing advertised, (at Your Funeral Guy Blogs)save amazon .com and the “Rest In Peace” book so folks can access low cost funeral options.

Funeral Industry| Funeral News Blog | by Your Funeral Guy

Nice present for the last day of 2009 and the end of a decade.

Your Funeral Guy Statement Original to this blog post

Sadly another funeral industry site says goodbye to alternative funerals, fair balanced and unafraid.

To make matters worse there are no forum|comment rules or guidelines at ConnecingDirectors.com

Your Funeral Guy: #1 of Five Things to Know Before Shopping For A Low Cost Funeral

12 Dec

Here are 5 things You need to know before shopping for a funeral. 1). The basics of the funeral process.2) The two contracts at every funeral. 3). The basics of the funeral rule. 4). The No Decline Basic Services Fee. 5. How to Read a General Price List (GPL)  Today we are covering #1.

1. The basics of the funeral process. The best way to handle this is to call a friend or relative. It is usually best to just  have them talk you through their experience so you may a get a handle on the funeral process. It is helpful to talk to more than one friend or relative.

You may consider a funeral cost book and  funeral planner like the book:
Rest in Peace: Insider’s Tips to the Low Cost Less Stress Funeral.This work is a helpful read and you can see the funeral process at a glance. You also may want to review blogs on the low cost funeral.

Another way to plan for your funeral is to go to one of two websites mywonderfullife .com or thefuneralsite.com These are free funeral planners on the web where you may record your plans and wishes for your friends and relatives. The funeralsite.com has created funeral guides that have low cost funeral homes listed. Right now they are have guides on the West Coast but theyare planning guides in every major metropolitan city in the United States.

To sum up begin planning to lower your funeral expenses and costs this way.

1. Talk to several friends or relatives about the funeral process.

2. Read about the low cost funeral process in blogs or a book.

3. Plan your funeral on the web. Use one of the free websites mentioned here.

Your Funeral Guy, Author, Funeral Director

Your Funeral Guy: Lower Cost Funeral Expenses Questions Answered

2 Dec

The other day I was asked questions about Low Cost Funeral Expenses. They were good questions and the answers came from Your Funeral Guy. You will find more details on all these questions at this blog.

How much do funerals generally cost?
$7,323.00 UDS…..to about 9,000 USD or more if you include Cemetery Costs
The most popular figure quoted is $6,000 USD

What are people doing to mitigate the costs of funerals?

1. Shopping around between different funeral homes, getting general price lists.

2. Negotiating with Funeral Directors Families are finding the courage to go in and negotiate with Funeral Directors due to the severe economic situation and the general lack of cash.
Funeral is in the End a Contract Negotiation in Western Civilization.

3. Choosing alternative Services

Closed caskets
Home funerals
Green funerals
No Embalming
Caskets from an alternate sources
Urns from alternative sources.
Memorial service
4. Choosing Alternative locations with or without A Funeral Director
Community center
Do it all at the Cemetery like Walt Disney
5.Choosing a Low Cost Funeral Home

6. Getting your Casket and other Funeral Product On the internet or from other alternative source.

Are ‘green’ funerals becoming more popular?
Green Funerals are popular in the United Kingdom and are coming from across the pond just like cremation did in the 1970’s.
They are growing on the West Coast and the East Coast
Green Funerals are lower cost funerals because there are no vault, grave liners, traditional caskets or Embalming.
Why are funerals so expensive?
Traditional funerals and Funeral Home owners operating cost has been constantly rising. Lower Cost Funerals are growing digging into funeral home profits. It is a low cost option for consumers. .
Are more people these days buying funeral insurance?
Term Life Insurance is a good funeral cost option. Preneed Funeral Policies have fell into dispute. Every month there is an incident where a Funeral Director runs off with the preneed money.
This year we have had the Illinois Funeral Directors Association-41 million dollars funeral trust mismanagement and the National Prearranged Services 500 million Dollar Theft.
The AARP Magazine had an article in February 2008 advising folks not to prepay a Funeral. I believe that this has taken hold.

This is all from the life experience of your funeral guy.
R. Brian Burkhardt, Your Funeral Guy, Author of the funeral book Rest in Peace: Insider’s Tips to the Low Cost Less Stress Funeral

Be sure to let me know how you came in under the average cost of a funeral.

Is this your funeral costGetty Images RF

Your Funeral Guy: Medicaid and Funeral Expenses #2

1 Dec

In the previous post You can come away thinking that medicaid does not ever cover funeral cost.

This is not the case in some cases you can get funeral cost covered under public aide.

Medicaid is a program to cover medical expenses. Public aide  is a program connected to medicaid that can pay funeral expenses in some states. Please check with your state.

1st the deceased must have minimal assets

2nd the funeral home must accept  Public aide funerals.Many funeral homes do not accept public aide funerals.

3rd If a medicaid spend down has been done and your loved one is in a nursing home they most likely will qualify for a public aide funeral.

4th Different states handle these programs differently.

My main point is if you do a lower cost funeral and use some of the tips in this book you may have to pay 0 for a funeral. This is your funeral cost book.

Rest in Peace: Insider’s Tips to the Low Cost Less Stress Funeral

Certainly if the public aide funeral is available to you use the funds for your lower cost funeral.

Your Funeral Guy.

All of this is from the life experience of your funeral guy.
Insider's Tips to the Low Cost Less Stress Funeral This is your funeral book

Your Funeral Guy: Lower Cost Funeral and the Supreme Court Justice

26 Nov

A Chief Justice of the Supreme Court was an early pioneer of the Lower Cost Funeral

He joined the other Low Cost Funeral Pioneers: Jesica Mitford and Walt Disney!

My first encounter with the lower cost funeral occurred in 1971 while I was at my First College, Illinois State University. Nixon was dominating the New As the D.C urban legend goes he  wanted Three things. 1)Simple 2) Cheap 3) No open casket. Simple meant no frills. Cheap meant a low cost funeral No open casket meant a closed casket with no public viewing.
All I remember from 1971 was that there was a large crowd at the funeral and the burial was held at Arlington National Cemetery, and that it was a ceremony filled with emotion.

Little did I know that 30 years later on September 11, 2001 I would enter funeral service and become an advocate of the cost funeral. Hugo Black was truly founder in this cause.
Simple, Cheap, and No Open Casket works for a low cost funeral today. This still works in 2008.

Today this is something of a funeral cost  urban legend.

In 2008 I would reverse the order but leave the same instructions
1) No open Casket in 2008 this means a low cost casket sold on the internet.
2) Cheap
means a low cost funeral and maybe a cremation.
3) Simple means a negotiated lower cost funeral with no funeral home scams.

So the 1971 to 2008 update means



3) No Funeral Home Scams.

Little did I know that I was later to work at Arlington National Cemetery and write Rest in Peace Insiders Tips to the Low Cost Less Stress Funeral.

Your Funeral Guy

R.Brian Burkhardt

Funeral Director and Author

Be Sure to let me know how you lowered the cost of your funerals!